“Mark Geragos (CNN contributor) is going in about the results of this autopsy!  It doesn’t sound good for the cop’s argument!”   That’s what my wife yelled to me as she sat in the living room, and I in the basement.  We were both watching different news stations as they covered the events in Ferguson and the case for Michael Brown vs. Officer Darren Wilson.  I said to her, “Well that may mean something to The Feds.”

“What?,” she questioned.  “Well, (I elaborated), federal officials are the only ones who would seek to use such information as a means of why they should or shouldn’t prosecute.  Certainly The County isn’t.  They aren’t looking to seriously investigate a case that would hurt Wilson regardless of any facts.”   Then it hit her… “Oh yea,” she said.

This conversation brought to bear the inward struggle that many of us are facing in the midst of this ‘investigation’ and ‘waiting for all of the facts’ to come out from the state.  You see if Michael Brown had shot officer Darren Wilson under any circumstances whatsoever, he would have been arrested at the very least.  He wouldn’t be home receiving a pay check with enough benefit of the doubt  by authorities to keep Al Capone  out of court for tax evasion.  There wouldn’t be cries from authorities telling his family, friends and supporters to calm down, and wait for the investigation; all while strategically releasing information to defame the officer’s name and reputation.  There would not be a militarized police presence in Wilson’s neighborhood telling angry residents to go home, shut up or be pelted with rubber bullets and smothered with tear gas.  There wouldn’t be tanks in Wilson’s neighborhood.  There would be no photos of white friends of Wilson’s holding their hands up in surrender while several officers point automatic rifles at them.  No, in essence what we have if a reversal of fortune, a twisting of the process.  Those who are supposed to advocate for the death of an unarmed man and his family, are in reality doing the total opposite.  They are working 24-7 to convict Brown of being a menace to society;  A worthless thug worthy of at least 6 bullets including two to the dome for simply existing.  They don’t see Michael as a young man with a future ahead of him, on his way to college.  They see him as a wretch to their America; a nuisance to be tolerated only when totally necessary.  After all, they can no longer legally be enslaved and they can’t be made to go back to Africa.  What an inconvenience.

This sobering reality came crushing down to my wife as she pondered the thought.  Not that she didn’t realize it before.  For there is still something inherent in black folk that says, “If the evidence is there ‘they’ will pursue it and “they” will follow it where it leads. They have to!”   That county prosecutor Bob McCullough would actually do the job of pursuing the truth in the shooting of Michael Brown.   Alas it is not to be.  McCullough, the man who publicly scorned Governor Nixon for replacing his merry band of trigger happy police officers, the man in charge of leaking information condemning the 18 year old dead kid, is in charge of the evidence presented to a secret grand jury as opposed to public preliminary hearing.

As we talked more about the predicament we find ourselves in, we discussed our Caucasian friends, some who happen to be conservative and their reactions to what they are witnessing since August 9th.  As events have passed and information has been revealed, they have conferred with us to tap our hearts, to get our perspectives.  They see us as people who lean to what we believe is right regardless of one’s ethnicity.  She explained in this case some of our Caucasian friends seem to vacillate between, ‘Maybe the cop was wrong,’ and ‘Gee he may have been justified.  They are struggling with admitting that a police officer could actually be a sinner and do something sinful while in uniform.  That he could have biases, prejudices, and that he would act them out in the line of duty.  I told her that is absolutely the truth, but equally true is that people who feel this way also have a difficult time believing that the black people who are victims of these cops are legitimate people, citizens who are worthy of such considerations.  The first is easy to get them to admit to, the second, no so much.  But in uplifting the cop’s moral standing in one’s mind, you must downgrade the target of his affliction.  Can’t have one without the other.

Much has been made of the military-like presence with the police.  Some dress in fatigues as if they are in Fallujah and  many have removed their name tags so that they couldn’t be named if they themselves commit crimes against the citizens.  Are they attacked before they shoot, or are they challenging those in the streets protesting peacefully?  Regardless I question the tactics.  Why are they patrolling the streets anyway?  While they were in the streets Sunday night there was looting.  There hasn’t been any fighting in the streets.  The only conflicts have been between people and the police blocking paths and drawing lines in the sands.  If they are concerned about looters, who not stand in front of businesses instead?  I suppose that isn’t as much fun and confrontational.  After all, how often does one get to use the military equipment they got from the Pentagon for the ‘war on drugs?”  How often does one get to scream “Bring it on you fucking animals!” to a crowd of black folks he’s just waiting to sink his teeth of  hate and rage into?

Then there is the history.  If white people honestly think that this case and the anger of Black America is solely about Michael Brown they are deceiving themselves.  This case is on behalf of every black person who has been pulled over, arrested, beaten, or killed for merely being black, and the officers who gets away with it.  Locally speaking, go to any municipality among St. Louis County on traffic court night.  All you will see is black folk standing in a line long enough to wrap the building.  These municipalities get the majority of their revenue by giving out traffic tickets.  Doesn’t matter if it’s Ferguson, Florissant, Dellwood, or Hazelwood.  And don’t talk to me about population, because that would assume that the only drivers in their towns are residents.  And though every police study in these United States show that Whites are more likely to carry contraband, stops by the police don’t reflect the data.

As for this case, so far we know a few important facts.  In the biggest case of St. Louis County Police history, they not only are choosing to use a grand jury (secret) vs a preliminary hearing (public and standard for a felony potential crime) county prosecutor McCullough is assigning his assistant to do the case.  **Now we KNOW McCullough is pulling the strings and making all the decisions on whats presented and how it’s presented.** However, he won’t be the face of it.  In addition, Darren Wilson IS BEING ALLOWED TO TESTIFY TO THE GRAND JURY… (which I repeat is in secret)… (How often does THAT happen)  Consider too that McCullough has been legally challenged for decades regarding the amount of jury strikes he’s used against African-Americans.  What do you think the grand jury will look like? Lastly,  McCullough has said this process will take weeks or months.  Why is that?  This is not a whodunit, but the contrary.  Not to mention, if Michael Brown ‘bumrushed’ Wilson and beat the hell out of him as the county officials are alleging, that should be easily proven with hospital records and photos.   McCullough could end this quickly!  One would think anyway right?  I’m reminded of the Kermit Meme when he sarcastically says, “But that’s none of my business.”

As of Tuesday night supporters of Darren Wilson have collected over $25,000 for him.  The question is why?  He’s on paid leave.  In addition, he won’t be charged with a crime by the county.  In essence Wilson’s defense is already being paid by tax payers.  Seems to me the money is a reward!  A thank you for his part in keeping the tone and precedent alive regarding black male life.  As I told my wife, “This isn’t about Mike Brown to McCullough and county officials;  They do NOT want to send a message that any unjust shootings by a White police officer to a black male/female could be challenged in a court of law.  McCullough has the support of police for a reason.  It’s a long standing relationship.  Question one, and they would have to question every fatal shooting or beating going forward.  They are going to stick together on this one like they have previusly.  This is about precedence and a tone set throughout the area.  He is not going to be ‘that guy’ that prosecutes his own.

Some of our well meaning white friends are having a hard time with resonating with our position.  They love my wife and I.  They think highly of our character.  They feel we are exceptional.  We continue to try to dismiss that myth.  That we are not exceptional and more important, we are not the exception.  We are in the same boat as Michael Brown.  And truth be told, no matter what they think of us, if we were to be confronted and shot dead in the streets by a white police officer, they too along with many other white folks who don’t know us will believe it justified regardless of the circumstances.  What will it take to open their eyes?  A courageous exercise in self awareness and American history.  It’s a challenge for humans to perform.  For in doing so they would have to consider reevaluating so much of what they have inherently believed their entire lives.  Its the same challenges that exist when it comes to opening ones mind about their life long religious beliefs.  And that’s hard.  Especially when our White conservative friends are used to having their interest represented in a court of law.  They haven’t been hurt or labeled in the same vain as their Black counterparts in the justice system.

I mean… just look at this satirical yet truthful summation of events.  If this doesn’t confirm the hypocrisy, I’m not hopeful.  And I can tell you this, when they let Darren Wilson off, preserving the precedence,  history will yet again repeat itself.  Another black youth will be murdered by white police, and the same song and dance will be sung and danced by the same white people who have not confronted their prejudices favoring the cops while cursing the value of Black life.