I’m Just Saying…. Seriously~

…  or musings from being intoxicated during Monday Night Football

* Well with the Dow dropping in record numbers and the Bail Out plan in pieces on the floors of congress, I figure it’s going to take an “Incredible” to fix the economy.  Seriously!

* So I was in the hood the other day.  Picked up a bootleg copy of that new Samuel L. Jackson movie, “Lakeview Terrace.”  Sometimes you really have to watch those bootlegs.  I mean a guy can get ripped off.  I knew something was wrong when I saw Snoop Dogg playing Sam’s role.  Yea the c.o.p was being played by the D. O. Double G.  And then these bootleggers get all imaginative with their movies adding stuff that’s not supposed to be there.  They like to mix movies like a DJ mixes hip hop records.  So my bootleg copy of Lakeview was combined with Tyler Perry’s, Diary of a Mad Black Woman.  Yea.  After Snoop swiped a credit card down Mudear’s ass, I just turned the movie off.  I’m just saying! 

 tylerperrysmadeasfamilyreunion_clip250b.jpg

* Did you get a load of John McCain smirking everytime Barack Obama got off on his ass in the debates the other night?  He had this look as if to say, “Look Sambo, you talk well and all but I am the white man… what do you think is going to happen on November 4th?” I don’t want to start any rumors, but right after the debates I was looking at an episode of Beavis and Butthead.  And Butthead asked the question,… “Senator McCain, are you my daddy?  Seriously!

Beavis-Butthead-p21.jpg

* So anyway, did I mention that it’s been quite a while since I had some?  Well when it’s been long enough for a guy everything you look at starts remindind you of sex.   I was watching Monday Night Football.  And at halftime ESPN has this segment called “The Fastest 3 Minutes in Sports.”  It’s where they cram all the highlights and scores from the previous Sunday’s NFL games.  I sat there and thought to myself, “Hmm… the fastest three minutes in sports.  Is that really supposed to be for highlights?  Or is it code for the amount of time a guy can get away from the TV and get a quickie before the third quarter starts?  I mean, thats about all a girl can ask for during halftime anyway right?

Oh… so what did I do with my three minutes?  Well that’s none of your business so I’m not gonna tell you that. 

Oh.. you want to know what happened Sunday?  No problem.  Carolina beat Atlanta, Cleveland beat Cincinnati, Jacksonville beat Houston, Kansas City upset Denver, The Saints beat the 49ers, Tampa beat Green Bay, (Aaron Rogers has a separated shoulder) Tennessee beat Minnesota, the Chargers beat the Raiders, (Kiffen is giong to be fired at any moment now) Buffalo beat the Rams (Linehan got fired) the Skins beat the Cowboys (T.O. is selfish) Chicago beat Philly, the Jets beat Arizona and Brett Favre had 6 touchdown passes.  I’m just saying….Seriously

 Steelers beat Ravens in OT

New Music Releases ~ The Real Dope

….from cmac, your quasi music critic.

So ya’ll know how much I love music.  I consider it my drug of choice.  I saw the dope man the other day and got some new stuff.  I wanted to spread the word and allow others to share in the joy.  If you want to get high with me, then stop at your local drug house record store of choice for these selections. 

Exist

This is classic Tony Rich… smooth and mellow.  The first track, “Part The Waves,” gets it all started and it continues with, “Jordan,” “Sugar Hill” and “Sweet Addiction.”  The tempo is consistent and it flows wonderfully.  As a friend of mine said, “I think somebody told Rich that, ‘Hey, you know you sound best when you sound like Babyface… and he ain’t singing no more.  So why not? ‘ You can jam this in the car on an evening ride or just chill on it with a glass of your favorite wine.

The Way I See It

This is something totally different than what you used from one of the creators of the group Tony Toni Tone.  This guy goes totally retro Motown on us with songs that sound like they could be in the movie Cooley High.  He even kept the songs to around three minutes to fit the era that inspired them.  Still he has enough insight to bring along Joss Stone, Stevie Wonder and Jay-Z.   With this CD you get nostalgia and four part harmony that you can’t help but to enjoy.

Fearless

OMG – this is FEARLESS.  This 21 year old is from Philly, and is a prodigy of Missy Elliott.  This has to go to my list of coldest and most innovative debuts.  Ok, first of all she has this raspy voice that reminds you of Lauryn Hill at times… especially on, “Need You Bad.”  When I first heard that jam on the radio I almost got pissed cause I felt she was biting too hard.  But when you travel through the CD she shows her own flavor in full form and it shines through.  I have never heard anything like this before.  Look, her first cut is called, “Bust Your Windows.”  As a guy I’m like, “What the…?”  But the song is so tight and you understand why she had to do it.  After that she gets on down and explores a plethora of subject matters with, “Lions, Tigers and Bears,” a very thoughtful piece on love and fear.  “Call Me Guilty,” deals with a woman’s last ditch solution to solve the problem of an abusive man that would make Mary J. Blige bow down!  “One Night Stand,” – funny about how a woman who prefers the fast life but runs across the wrong right brother and gets caught up, “making pancakes in the morning.”  This CD is sooooo refreshing!  Full of originality and style.  It’s a must have for your collection!

A Long Time Coming

From the surprise category – yes the same Wayne Brady your thinking of.  The, “Do I have to smack a bitch?” Wayne Brady from the Dave Chappelle Show.  You see like Jamie Foxx this comedian has the jones for music too.  And if you are familiar with Brady’s ability to imitate other voices, it shouldn’t be a surprise that he did this project.  Wayne Brady did Vegas for a while.  Apparently the record executives heard him incorporate his singing into the show.  They asked him to do it the way he had on stage without changing anything.  This is the result – an old skool soulful throw back sound that is mature and ready for immediate play on your CD player.  Brady has chops!  To go along with it he has great production value and my favorite word again… originality.  He definitely rocks his own style and took this work seriously.  It clearly shows.  This shit music is pimp!

And then there is this….

WHACK ASS ALBUM OF THE SEASON…..

Joe Thomas, New Man

I was listening to Joe’s, “New Man.”  I had to look at the CD again and make sure it wasn’t Neo or Chris Brown instead.  I don’t know what happened other than perhaps they are trying to draw a new and younger audience.  The funny thing is that the best parts of the CD of the last 5 snippets of music that is supposed to be released in Feburary 2009.  All five of those sounds hot!  I don’t know about the new man, but please Joe, bring back the old man!  On the upside at least the brother got resistered to vote yesterday thanks to Tom Joyner. 

Something Else (Includes Six Bonus Tracks) [Amazon.com Exclusive]

Looking forward to that Robin Thicke scheduled to be released on September 30th….

Temptation

The subject of temptation is a fascinating one to me.  As people we are always tempted with something.  Normally when the word temptation is used it has to do with a form of the forbidden.  For instance if I commit to fasting for a certain amount of time, during that period I will at some point be tempted to eat.  I may be on day 3 of a 10 day fast for instance, and all of a sudden it’s free pizza day at work.  I can smell it, my stomach is grumbling and my body is craving the cheese and sauce.  Now what?

First let’s first define temptation.  I didn’t search the dictionary, but for the sake of this post, we will define temptation as: a desire to do or partake in something that is at least temporarily forbidden.  (I.e. food when fasting)  It is the compromise of the highest form of original intention, infecting personal character and integrity.  The core of these temptations stem from three areas: The lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life.  No temptation will exist without at least one of these at play.  Examples:

Lust of the flesh – You know you got a lady or a man – yet you feel tempted to flirt or allow yourself to be flirted with by that attractive person you see at the mall. 

Lust of the eyes – While at the same mall you see that outfit that you think is hot.  But you know you don’t need that outfit.  Furthermore, if you spend that money, you will put yourself behind the 8 ball and it will cost you more than the price of the outfit later.

Pride of Life – Driving from the mall a car cuts you off as you turn to approach the exit.  You know the best thing to do is turn the page and be thankful there was no accident.  Walk away.  But something inside says you should give that fool a piece of your mind. 

These are just some general examples.  We are constantly bombarded with temptations through life’s experiences as we just covered.  We are also tempted through media and advertisement.  Even the way your local grocery store shelves its products is a way to tempt you to spend more money on the most expensive products.

I am learning that what we do with temptation is what makes or breaks us in daily life.  Do we face temptation head on or do we slide backwards into its cunning and deceptive ways?  Recognizing temptation is the first key.  So often we are bombarded with images and situations, I’m not sure we realize how much we face on the day to day. 

The best way to deal with temptation is to confront it head on.  By that I mean we shouldn’t play ourselves into acting like we aren’t tempted when we really are.  If you are tempted to do something, just admit it.  Its not a sign of weakness but of strength to face the facts of self evaluation.  How many times have we put ourselves in bad situations because we were in denial about what was going on inside our hearts?  Only to find later we are filled with regrets of personal failings.  Once we face the reality of what is tempting us, next decide what to do about it.  If we take immediate action, we are far more likely to overcome that temptation.  If we allow the imagination to fester and permeate our psyche, we are more likely to fall into said temptation.  Excuse me for putting it this way, but temptation is a subtle mother-fucker!  And you can’t be pussying around with it either!  It has to be handled and dealt with head on or it will get you caught up with the quickness. 

For each person it’s important to know what it is you really want out of life.  What is the level of happiness you want to achieve?  What kind of house do you want to live in?  How healthy would you like to be and what kind of body do you want to have?  What kind of relationships do you want with your significant other, family and friends?  What kind of impact would you like to make in this life?  What do you need to do to make that impact?  What tenancies and weaknesses do you have that would prevent you from living your best life.  How far are you willing to go to maximize your potential and live your best life?  Answer these questions and you are on your way to living life in a real way. 

There is no shame in being tempted.  Jesus himself was tempted.  It will be an ongoing happening for the rest of our lives.  The man/woman of the highest level of integrity will recognize self tendencies and take appropriate action in order to ensure that life is lived with the greatest amount of freedom without the constant weight of consequences from bad decisions.  If our eyes are wide open to who we are and what is before us, we can use temptation and our success/failings as a barometer to measure personal growth.  The thing about temptation is this – being tempted never made anyone do anything they didn’t want to do.  No matter what temptations we face in life, we always retain the final rights of choice.  To not recognize temptation sets us up to merely fall over and over again into cycles of failure.  Understanding and self- knowing will help us make the right choices that we are willing to live with. 

Whatever you do with temptation is up to you.  Just keep your eyes open and take responsibility for what happens.

Commentary from CNN’s Campbell Brown

Commentary: Sexist treatment of Palin must end

By Campbell Brown
CNN

Editor’s Note: Campbell Brown anchors CNN’s “Campbell Brown: Election Center” at 8 p.m. ET Mondays-Fridays. She delivered this commentary during the “Cutting through the Bull” segment of Tuesday night’s broadcast.

NEW YORK (CNN) — Frankly I have had it, and I know a lot of other women out there who are with me on this. I have had enough of the sexist treatment of Sarah Palin. It has to end.

She was in New York on Tuesday meeting with world leaders at the U.N. And what did the McCain campaign do?

They tried to ban reporters from covering those meetings. And they did ban reporters from asking Gov. Palin any questions.

I call upon the McCain campaign to stop treating Sarah Palin like she is a delicate flower who will wilt at any moment.

This woman is from Alaska for crying out loud. She is strong, she is tough, she is confident. And you claim she is ready to be one heartbeat away from the presidency. If that is the case, then end this chauvinistic treatment of her now. Allow her to show her stuff.

Allow her to face down those pesky reporters just like Barack Obama did today, just like John McCain did today. Just like Joe Biden has done on numerous occasions. Let her have a real news conference with real questions.

By treating Sarah Palin differently from other candidates in this race, you are not showing her the respect she deserves.

Free Sarah Palin.

Free her from the chauvinistic chains you are binding her with.

Sexism in this campaign must come to an end. Sarah Palin has as much a right to be a real candidate in this race as the men do.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/09/24/campbell.brown.palin/index.html#cnnSTCText

The Man Bible 7 : Do It For Love

The way a man penetrates the world should be the same way he penetrates his woman: not merely for personal gain or pleasure, but to magnify love, openess, and depth. 

– The next time you embrace your woman sexually, feel your ultimate desire.  Your deepest desire in life.  Feel why you are doing anything at all in life, and specifically, why you are uniting with your lover.  There may be many lesser reasons, but what is your deepest, ultimate reason?

– Most men’s ultimate reason for doing anything has to do with discovering their deepest truth, enjoying total freedom and love, and giving their fullest gift.  Yet, many settle for for enjoying a little bit of freedom and love while incompletely giving their gifts. 

– When a man give his true gift of sex to his woman, he penetrates and blooms her beyond all limits into love.  It is the same with the world.  To bloom woman and world for real takes authenticity, persistence, and courage of heart.   A man must know the truth at his core and be willing to give his gifts fully.  No holding back.  He must be willing to dedicate his sex and his life to magnifying love by penetrating woman and world with his true gifts.  The willingness is rare.

– Most men are limpened with doubts and uncertainties.  Or they hold back their true drive because of fear.  So they diddle their woman and the world just enough to extract the pleasure and comfort they need to assuage their nagging sense of falsity and incompleteness.  But if you are willing to discover and embrace your truth, lean through your fears, and give everything you’ve got, you can penetrate the world and your woman from the core of your being and bloom them into love without limit.  You can ravish your woman so deeply that her surrender breaks your heart into light.  You can press yourself into the world with such enduring love that the world opens and receives your deepest gifts.

– There is no essential difference between entering your woman’s feminine heart and entering fully into the world.  Both forms of intercourse, sexual and worldly, require sensitivity, spontaneity and a strong connection to deep truth in order to penetrate chaos and closure in a way that love prevails.

– Neither woman nor world are predictable.  They will often seem to resist your gifts and test your capacity to persist.  And just as surely, they will tenderly respond to the authenticity of your relaxed ministrations, the freedom expressed in your humor, and the invasion of your a adamant love.  They will open in love and receive you fully – only to resist and test you again, moments or days later.  Neither woman nor world can be second-guessed, or fooled.  They know when you are just dicking around.  They want to receive you for real. – David Deida

Uhhh, no commentary necessary on this one.  I think he said it all. 

 

 

A Salute To Coaches

One of the most important names a man/woman can be called is, “coach.”  At first glance a coach merely looks like a guide or a teacher of sporting fundamentals, teamwork, competition and sportsmanship.  But often they are so much more.  They are mentors, and are often looked upon by players as people who can help them accomplish something important. 

I’ve followed and participated in sports all of my life in some form.  I’ve played for some coaches I adored and some I abhorred.  This had nothing to do with whether a coach was a hard liner or an encourager in terms of style.  I am talking about other areas that make the difference.  These are the two questions I ask of my coaches.

“Does Coach know anything about the sport he/she is trying to teach me? ”

“Is Coach in this for me or for him?”

I could always tell on the first day of practice what the answer to these questions were.  And that determined my experience on the team. 

A coach can have a tremendous amount of influence on a kid.  The right coach can get a player to do things he never imagined he could.  He can help the player to learn some terriffic lessons in navigating in life through sports.  On the other hand a coach can be a horrible influence and teach young people the total opposite of how to handle situations or themselves.  I have seen both sides of these.  And one thing I cannot tolerate to see is a coach who works with young people for the sake of his/her own ego and sense of glory.  One of the coolest thing to see is a coach who loves the kids he/she works with. 

As a basketball official, I see coaches all the time.  Many of them I’ve worked often. 

A case of knowing a coach is in it for the right reasons is one that I ran into recently at a tournement.  This guy is a two time Missouri High School Coach of the Year and won a state championship.  Certainly he is one of the most respected basketball coaches in the state.  His players go to Division 1 universities and some have gone to the NBA.  When I officiated one of his games recently I would have expected to see high school teens getting ready for the upcoming season.  What I saw instead was a group of 5th graders learn at the hands of one of the best.  From the tip off to the final buzzer this guy taught, instructed and encouraged his players to an easy victory.  His team was calm, seem to feel no pressure and really enjoyed themselves.  This wasn’t the first time I saw a coach who could coach pretty much anywhere he wanted take time for younger underdeveloped players.  Though I don’t care who wins the games I officiate, it felt good to see adults who understand the importance of taking time out for our youth – and who can handle this great responsibility correctly.  Some of these coaches are nuts and shouldn’t be around young people at all.  Most of them (even the ones that don’t seem to know anything about the game) are caring and compassionate towards our future leaders of society.

For everyone who takes time to coach and guide our youth the right way… I salute you!

Poems By Resonate’: Flexible

Sup Familia, 

From time to time I like to dabble with a little poetry.  Actually I have quite a bit the last couple months.  At some point I plan to tour some of the local spoken word venues and share.  However, I will post some here first and share with you the readers. 

My poems range from different areas of my experience.  And regardless of how I feel, I am learning to express feelings and emotions making art of passion and pain – fear and love – joy and suffering. 

My poet’s name is Resonate’  Let’s just say he is my artistic alter ego.  Hope you enjoy~

 

Flexible

 

Left or right up and down

Standing still my heart pounds

Holding my peace and fighting the wind

Start then stop – begin again

Love with all my heart

Tender smooth and smart

Hard not compromising beliefs

Jackin’ rough no signs of relief

Whats your problem you got some beef?

Back up off me, damn keep the peace

 

© 2008 Resonate’

 

 

The Conservative White Male/Vagina Vote – Bull Shiggidy!

I have to tell you – I have had it up to here with the McCain/Palin ticket, their media manipulators and the STUPID Americans that are still allowing themselves to be playd by their foolishness. 

You would think that when people see that the house is burning, they would have the good sense to get out.  But oh no!  Some of these fools would rather get burned than to have a black fire fighter help them out.  I SAID IT – YES I DID! 

Look all around us.  The war against terrorism as it relates to Iraq has been a dismal failure.  It was doomed from the start.  It’s so tired we don’t even talk about it anymore.  The economy is in the tank.  Freddie and Fannie are hanging on by way of welfare, Lehman Brothers, a Wall Street baller for almost 160 years is shot to shiggidy Merrill Lynch almost 95 years old sold out to Bank of America, and now AIG.  Unemployment is rampant, the mortgage crisis continues to swell and this fool McCain maintains that the economy is fundamentally strong.  What the fudge? 

It makes sense that to him things are fine.  Hell, he has 8 houses neither of which I am sure are in danger of being in foreclosure status, and his wife has more money than God.  His finances are quite “fundamentally strong.”  I ain’t hating.  But damn come on America.  Some of y’all are still going for this crap?  I work on the trading floor of one of the biggest securities exhange firms in the world, and I hear the rumblings every day. 

As for Palin, this woman who has no freggin idea what she has gotten herself into – makes a fool out of herself while interviewing soft ball throwing Charles Gibson saying that we would actually fight Russia because Georgia is a part of NATO.  WRONG!  And yet the polls in mid September are still close and some of y’all want this woman in the VP’s chair?  She has all kinds of shiggidy going on at home that she refuses to answer to.  After 8 years of corruption you would think Americans would have had enough.  It’s one thing for rich people to vote for the McCain/Palin ticket.  They obviously think their coffers won’t get touched.  Recent history shows otherwise.  If a rising tide lifts all boats, surely if you keep drilling holes in the Titanic it will eventually sink too.  I can see if they are blind to this.  But for middle to lower class Americans to even consider this foolery is beyond me.

Many Americans played themselves when “W” got into office.  They thought Gore was old time Washington and an extension of Clinton.  “W” came off as the hick guys wanted to have a beer with.  So never-mind he seemed out of touch with the basic needs of the nation – they just wanted a good ole’ boy, a cowboy like Ronald Reagan to be in office.  The second term was more of the same.  They allowed scare tactics about terrorism and swift boat ads to down Kerry, who was a war hero.  I know Kerry was not the idea candidate, but you picked a man who ran from service over a man who served with honor.   If you felt that service in war was not enough to be pres.,  what the hell happened to that thinking?  How did McCain’s service record over the same period become such a virtue for the presidency?  Speaking of Gore, are the McCain people saying this dude invented the Blackberry now?  But I digress. 

Some women are still bitter about Obama’s victory over Clinton. So they are willing to vote with their vaginas and going with Palin, a woman who stands for everything Hillary doesn’t.  What kind of shiggidy is that?  Black folks did not endorse Clarence Thomas for the supreme court because he was black.  We know that everyone who is our skin folk are not necessarily our kin folk.  We would rather have had another white man who was fair than a black man who is a garden tool for neo-conservative interest and a puppet of Justice Scalia’s.  Women need to learn the same message.  Making history is one thing, damaging your future for the sake of making history is another.  You think she is a friend to the average woman?  Check how how she deals with rape and domestic violence against women in the state of Alaska. When she was mayor of Wasilla, women who were raped or sexually abused had to pay for their own rape kits.   

I’ve already made it known to some and I will say it publicly.  If McCain/Palin get the White House, and we find that the difference were Clinton supporters who decided that they didn’t want to vote for a black man, even a black man who has their economic interest at heart – a man who has the best ideas for this country who happens to be black – you will get exactly what you deserve over the next 4-8 years.  I’m telling you NOW don’t cry on my shoulders cause I ain’t gone have NO love for ya!  When your jobs go bye bye , you can’t put your kids in college and fuel and food cost push crime to an all time high… I don’t want to hear it!  It’s amazing how racism is such a cancer and yet people would rather die from the self inflicted sickness of it than do something to help themselves – simply because the help may come by way of the dark hand that they are not used to.  AMAZING! 

SIDE NOTE: White Democrats who voted for Hillary but who choose not to vote for Obama should remember that it was the black vote that put the Clinton’s over the top TWICE.  It was the black vote that stuck with Bill through Whitewater and Monica Lewinski.  Why do you think he went around thinking he was the first black president?  It was black women who stood by Hillary when Bill was gettin’ head in the Oval Office and said she was courageous.  And now some of y’all act like you can’t vote for the black man who beat her?  If you can’t do right, never again ask me to participate in putting another white democratic nominee in the highest office.  My vote will not be whored out to those who can’t appreciate or represent me when the time comes.  Back to the issue at hand. 

Lets compare and contrast.  McCain supporters refer to Obama as being a glorified speech maker with no real solutions.  McCain hasn’t even spoken on the issues, cause he’s too busy distracting us with lipstick comments about Palin.  McCain supporters call Obama elitist.  What?  Are you saying a man who has achieved great things like becoming the first African-American head of the Harvard Law Review, and taught 12 years of Constitutional law is elitist?  What – because he’s smart?  What?  You don’t want him upholding the constitution?  You would rather have a dumb or lesser informed person in the White House?  You are just like the kids in school who put down the kids making straight A’s saying they are “acting white.”

Let’s be clear.  This race isn’t about issues.  It’s all about race and gender… mostly race.  I hope for the sake of the nation the majority of us make the right decision – but if not – I don’t want to hear any more bellyaching from the folks who put these clowns in charge after they flub up the rest of the country.

This is some Bull Shiggidy!

White Priviledge: Tim Wise

 I got this from a friend in an email.  Tim Wise has been the leading critic of white priviledge in America.  This post is yet another reason why. 

A BUZZFLASH GUEST CONTRIBUTION

By Tim Wise

For those who still can’t grasp the concept of white privilege, or who are constantly looking for some easy-to-understand examples of it, perhaps this list will help.

White privilege is when you can get pregnant at seventeen like Bristol Palin and everyone is quick to insist that your life and that of your family is a personal matter, and that no one has a right to judge you or your parents, because “every family has challenges,” even as black and Latino families with similar “challenges” are regularly typified as irresponsible, pathological and arbiters of social decay.

White privilege is when you can call yourself a “fuckin’ redneck,” like Bristol Palin’s boyfriend does, and talk about how if anyone messes with you, you’ll “kick their fuckin’ ass,” and talk about how you like to “shoot shit” for fun, and still be viewed as a responsible, all-American boy (and a great son-in-law to be) rather than a thug.

White privilege is when you can attend four different colleges in six years like Sarah Palin did (one of which you basically failed out of, then returned to after making up some coursework at a community college), and no one questions your intelligence or commitment to achievement, whereas a person of color who did this would be viewed as unfit for college, and probably someone who only got in in the first place because of affirmative action.

White privilege is when you can claim that being mayor of a town smaller than most medium-sized colleges, and then Governor of a state with about the same number of people as the lower fifth of the island of Manhattan, makes you ready to potentially be president, and people don’t all piss on themselves with laughter, while being a black U.S. Senator, two-term state Senator, and constitutional law scholar, means you’re “untested.”

White privilege is being able to say that you support the words “under God” in the pledge of allegiance because “if it was good enough for the founding fathers, it’s good enough for me,” and not be immediately disqualified from holding office–since, after all, the pledge was written in the late 1800s and the “under God” part wasn’t added until the 1950s–while believing that reading accused criminals and terrorists their rights (because, ya know, the Constitution, which you used to teach at a prestigious law school requires it), is a dangerous and silly idea only supported by mushy liberals.

White privilege is being able to be a gun enthusiast and not make people immediately scared of you. White privilege is being able to have a husband who was a member of an extremist political party that wants your state to secede from the Union, and whose motto was “Alaska first,” and no one questions your patriotism or that of your family, while if you’re black and your spouse merely fails to come to a 9/11 memorial so she can be home with her kids on the first day of school, people immediately think she’s being disrespectful.

White privilege is being able to make fun of community organizers and the work they do–like, among other things, fight for the right of women to vote, or for civil rights, or the 8-hour workday, or an end to child labor–and people think you’re being pithy and tough, but if you merely question the experience of a small town mayor and 18-month governor with no foreign policy expertise beyond a class she took in college–you’re somehow being mean, or even sexist.

White privilege is being able to convince white women who don’t even agree with you on any substantive issue to vote for you and your running mate anyway, because all of a sudden your presence on the ticket has inspired confidence in these same white women, and made them give your party a “second look.”

White privilege is being able to fire people who didn’t support your political campaigns and not be accused of abusing your power or being a typical politician who engages in favoritism, while being black and merely knowing some folks from the old-line political machines in Chicago means you must be corrupt.

White privilege is being able to attend churches over the years whose pastors say that people who voted for John Kerry or merely criticize George W. Bush are going to hell, and that the U.S. is an explicitly Christian nation and the job of Christians is to bring Christian theological principles into government, and who bring in speakers who say the conflict in the Middle East is God’s punishment on Jews for rejecting Jesus, and everyone can still think you’re just a good church-going Christian, but if you’re black and friends with a black pastor who has noted (as have Colin Powell and the U.S. Department of Defense) that terrorist attacks are often the result of U.S. foreign policy and who talks about the history of racism and its effect on black people, you’re an extremist who probably hates America.

White privilege is not knowing what the Bush Doctrine is when asked by a reporter, and then people get angry at the reporter for asking you such a “trick question,” while being black and merely refusing to give one-word answers to the queries of Bill O’Reilly means you’re dodging the question, or trying to seem overly intellectual and nuanced.

White privilege is being able to claim your experience as a POW has anything at all to do with your fitness for president, while being black and experiencing racism is, as Sarah Palin has referred to it, a “light” burden.

And finally, white privilege is the only thing that could possibly allow someone to become president when he has voted with George W. Bush 90 percent of the time, even as unemployment is skyrocketing, people are losing their homes, inflation is rising, and the U.S. is increasingly isolated from world opinion, just because white voters aren’t sure about that whole “change” thing. Ya know, it’s just too vague and ill-defined, unlike, say, four more years of the same, which is very concrete and certain.

White privilege is, in short, the problem.

The Man Bible 6: Your Purpose Must Come Before Your Relationship

Admit to yourself that if you had to choose one or the other, the perfect intimate relationship or achieving your highest purpose in life, you would choose to succeed at your purpose.  Just this self-knowledge often relieves must pressure a man feels to prioritize his relationship when, in fact, it is not his highest priority. 

The first item that crossed my mind when I read this was the book of Genesis.  When God created Adam the first thing he gave him was not a woman, or kids, or friends – it was a job. (purpose)

Genesis 2:15: God took the Man and set him down in the Garden of Eden to work the ground and keep it in order.

He didn’t give him the woman until verse 22.  Before that he was managing the land and naming all the animals.  When Adam was well into his purpose God gave him someone to help him with it.  Otherwise He would have just created the man and woman and said, “Alight ya’ll, have at it. ”  This makes perfect sense and really resonates with me.  Inside of me is my reason for being.  And though our relationships are important, dare I say vital to a healthy existance, our purpose is our primary function – our reason for being.

When I am about my purpose I gain an inward peace that satisfies my deepest sense of belonging.  I feel connected to the universe and the energy I gain and then give out is pleasant; a source of healing.  In turn I can give totally within my relationships knowing that I took care of business.  I don’t feel the burden of knowing that I neglected the reason for my living.  At the same time, those that love me will respect this priority and push me towards making my full contribution to the universe.  With purpose come rewards, not the least of them is peace.  This peace will permeate the relationships and make them fully enjoyable.   

Now my favorite word when it comes to all things pertaining to life and wisdom is, “balance.”  If one has integrity he will not cheat those whom he loves out of valuable time and attention and make purpose an “excuse” not to participate or invest in the relationship.  What he will do is see to it that when he does participate he is fully present, giving total attention to the person he is spending time with – without distraction.  He does not think about the next task or what he will be doing tomorrow. 

Being fully present in all the things we do helps to give us that sense of balance where all prioritites have the time and attention necessary.